Monday, March 14, 2011

Conversation with Yoda

I really don't want to write this book. 

Truly passionate about writing this book, I thought you were.

Well ... I am but ... I don't have anything important to say.

A journey you have been on ... lessons to take back you have.

There are other, more important stories.
To others their stories belong.  You to share only is yours.

I don't have all the answers.

 Answers no one expects ... your story only.

What if it's not enough?

What if it is?

Do I have to try?

Do or not do.  There is no try. 

Many years ago I fell in love with Yoda, the Jedi Master in "Star Wars" who has great power and wisdom and an odd but compelling syntax.  His voice came back to me in the last few days as I've been trying to sort out my next steps.

An idea for a book was born about a year ago and in January I started actually writing it as an entry into Hampton Roads'  "Top Self-Help Author" contest. When I found out that I had not advanced to round 2 of the competition, I was disappointed (See Drinking Lemonade ) but it left an opening for a new idea ... and then other new ideas ... and then revisions of ideas.  The title changed, the focus changed, the book changed.  Feedback from the initial readers was encouraging ... with suggestions ... which I had hoped for ... but which left me wavering and uncertain about which way to go.

For the past few days, I questioned the whole enterprise and explored possible formats ... paper book, through a publisher or print-on-demand; eBook with graphics and interesting formatting, or ePub book for readers such as Kindle, iPhone and iPad but boring informat.  I'm in the midst of THREE internet marketing programs (which, in itself is crazy) and all of them have me focusing on questions such as:  Who's the reader?  What problem of theirs am I solving?  How can I become a "trusted authority?"

My mind tangled like spaghetti and I couldn't find a loose end to unravel the mess until this morning when I started the conversation with Yoda.  One of the problems with Yoda is that he doesn't tell me what to do ... he leaves the choice in my hands.  It's my choice:  do or not do.

I think I know the answer.  I really want to write the book.  But, I don't want to write it with one eye on the marketing mindset of a possible publisher.  I know I'm supposed to want to write it as a service to my readers.  And, I do hope that happens but, actually, I want ... I need ... to write it for myself as a way of understanding myself and my journey, especially these past four years.  Only by putting myself soul naked on the page will it be a service to myself or to others.

So ... this is step one ... more to come.


  1. When we are soul naked on the page, we serve the world, just by our presence. The gift you bring is YOU.

    Thank you for this blog. I too have been struggling with some of the same issues -- and your soul naked presence has helped me gain clarity.


  2. You inspired my blog this morning -- and me too!

  3. You have opportunity, time, and now a decision made for the best reason: your need to write for you. When you write from what you know and make it a story, the story becomes universal. So all of us women over 50 are saying, Go for it!!

  4. I agree; I did this for myself a year ago, and it may never get or go anywhere but it felt wonderful to write my way home. We are so driven by the need to market ourselves and our wisdom, but really it's all about expressing what needs to be expressed, not about who will read it or how to get it to them. I'm learning this the hard way, but it feels much better to release that part of the drive.

  5. I so understand the dilemma of wanting to market my creativity and finding that it stifles it. Sharing your process is inspiration for me. It is not only okay, but very neccessary to do it for myself.