Coyote Universe

Coyote is a trickster whose tricks often leave us baffled and feeling victimized.  But, Coyote is also a teacher so his tricks can lead us into new insights, new ways of responding, new understanding of our selves and the world around us.

The circumstances that yesterday led me to feeling like Charlie Brown was a trick of the Universe.  Literally.  I was in the midst of a rather sensitive email exchange with an old friend when communication stopped.  

We had had issues such as this in the past, so I picked up the Charlie Brown metaphor and ran with it ... or perhaps it would be closer to the truth to say that I laid down and wallowed in the victimhoodness (!) of it.  Rather than pick up the phone and ask what was going on, I became a righteous victim.  I took it personally and that blocked my ability to act with clarity and intent.

It turns out that, due to a technical glitch, my emails were being sent but not received ... which was creating the same Charlie Brown feelings on the other end.  Fortunately, not understanding why the communication had stopped ... and after reading yesterday's blog post ... my friend reached out to ask what was going on.   We still haven't figured out how or why the emails dropped into a black hole when they had been working perfectly, but it almost caused a serious break in a friendship that is important to both of us.

After thinking about this for awhile, it reminds me to turn back once again to The Four Agreements:

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word.
2. Don't Take Anything Personally.
3. Don't Make Assumptions.
4. Always Do Your Best.

I've always struggled with #2 but this incident makes me realize how much work I still have to do on #3.  The good thing that has come out of this is that we are both more confident in our friendship and have agreed to do a reality check before going "Charlie Brown" again.

Charlie Brown, Lucy and the Football

I think of myself as a sane person.

But then, Charlie Brown probably thought he was sane when every fall his thoughts turned to the glory of a magnificent kick into the end zone.  

Lured by Lucy's promise to hold the football so his fantasy can be fulfilled, time after time he falls into her trap and winds up on his backside.  Lucy is a master of deceit ingeniously finding new ways to be trusted.  Charlie Brown is starry-eyed, desperately wanting to believe her and live out his dream.  This gag went on year after year ... probably because we all recognize ourselves in the scenario.  Probably because we all think we're a little smarter than Charlie Brown and we won't fall for "it" one more time.

June 17th is my chosen "death day."  We all know and celebrate the day we are born but we don't know the day we will die.  So, I've chosen June 17th as my death day since it is half a year away from my birthday.  Every year I try to give up something that no longer serves me.  I've been trying to figure out what I'm going to let go of this year but finding it difficult to identify what needed to be released.  

Then the Universe revealed a pattern ... a pattern of trusting something or someone who has already proven to be a shimmering mirage ... a pattern of wishful thinking blocking my perception of reality.  

It's tricky ground though.  

As an advocate of possibility thinking, I believe things always live in the realm of the possible.  One day Lucy might actually choose to hold the football and Charlie Brown might actually get the kick of his dreams.  So that dance between being open to new outcomes and insanely expecting a different result from doing the same old thing can be a little toe tangling.  

I don't believe it's about giving up the dream ... but more a matter of creatively thinking about new ways to support it.  After all, Charlie Brown could have asked Linus to hold the football.  He could stop expecting Lucy to be someone she's not.  He could invent a remarkable new holder and kick footballs until his toes tingled.  He could patent it and become rich helping children across the world fulfill their own dreams of the perfect kick. ...

So, on this approach to the anniversary of my death day, I prepare to let go of misplaced trust ... but not the dreams behind it.

About this image:  Dreaming of Home

One of a new series of "glimpses."